"She is tolerable; but not handsome enough to tempt me." Such was the reflection of Mr. Darcy upon seeing Elizabeth Bennet for the first time. Incidentally, Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austin is one of the classic romantic stories. It means to celebrate the power of love in superseding uppity snobbishness. To conquer the heart of an unfailing pragmatist is attested as a proof of the truest and strongest kind of love. I, for one, have no comprehension of the validity of such a testimonial of love, so to speak.
In another instance, timeless classics like 'Dil wale dulhaniya le jayenge' may have made quite the romantic out of many men, but, more than that, it normalised an attitude of excessive jingoism that transcended to the extent of masochism.
Fast-forwarded to present times, undeniably, movies like 'Kabir Singh' are about a real-time scenario of the society today. However, the question remains, is the 'passion of love' to take away all sense of propriety and general responsibility?
Being in love and being loved are an integral part of living a happy life, but there is a glaring question gazing straight at all our faces, is it always made worthwhile? Putting up with self-important vanity, being emotionally drained? If the start itself is ridden with flaws such as these, then is it a stretch to expect the same and, perhaps, even worse in the future?
There's a necessity to establish the broad difference between desired and undesired courtship. Stalking and invasiveness as opposed to flirtation and showing concern have no room for misinterpretation. There exists no overlapping ground between the legitimate expression of love and harassment, and that's that.
Being protective or possessive often goes too far and ends up being constricting and unjust. There's no appeal in honing negative emotions like jealousy or insecurity in a relationship. And this goes for all the relationships that there is. Be it of lovers or not. As Khalid Gibran puts it, "If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were." We have to recognize and retain our respective places in life to ensure we do not end up being the reason of anybody's suffering.
Women, too, not only neglect and even encourage rather toxic dispositions which results in manifold agony, but also possess it themselves, that often goes unaccounted for due to excessive attention towards the 'misdeeds of the men'.
It is imperative that both men and women are made aware of the divide of desirable emotional expressions and undesirable ones. Children need to be taught about intricate emotional nuances as and when they are ready to understand and when they are beginning to be exposed to various emotional dynamics. We, as a society, must start celebrating sensibility and maturity in emotional expression and not the other way around.
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